Valerie

Writing 500 words per day? I am already at ten! That can’t be too hard. What if I applied that to a proposal though? I’d be done so fast! That is championship level fast. That is I know this sh*t fast. I want to be that fast. Here I go.

Thought experiment, what would you do?

...You're driving down a road in the middle of nowhere. You've got a two-seater car. It's pouring down rain and you pass this bus stop where you see three people huddled on a bench. This is the middle of nowhere so it could be hours before a bus arrives. Your car only has two seats, so you can't take everyone. You have to choose. The first person is an elderly woman who is getting sicker by the minute in this storm. She will most certainly die if she doesn't get out of the rain immediately. Sitting next to the old woman is a man who saved your life ten years ago. You haven't seen him since but this would be the perfect opportunity to pay him back for what he did for you. When you look at the third person, you know immediately you're looking at your soulmate...the person you've been waiting for your entire life. The rain continues to pour down and you're in a two-seater car. You can't put anyone in the trunk etc. What do you do?

I found this on ...the internet... and I know exactly what I would do. If anyone else wishes to answer, feel free, strangers are just friends I haven't met yet, right?

Hello...

It's been a while...

Lately I've been itching to write down my thoughts. Last night I had a dream that Tim and I were driving along this bridge and these clouds like rivers were raining all around us, when suddenly there was a tidal wave and we got washed up a hundred feet in the air, and I remember it still being a sunny day. I remember looking down at the car that I was clinging to with one hand, and then the wave that held us, and then the calm blue water we were about to crash into. Then the alarm went off...

I thought it was beautiful.

Other new things in my life, let's see...

I have two guinea pigs (Piglet and Speedy) and they are my precious babies.
I have a boyfriend named Tim of over a year and a half, my longest relationship, and also my baby <3
I am still doing fencing, and I am currently Women's Epee Captain
I am the president of the Society of Environmental Engineers, and I now appreciate the work that goes into having a leadership role. Thank the people that make things happen, it's a lot of work!
I am in my senior year as an Environmental Engineer, and next semester I want to finish my German Minor.
I live in a house in NE Gainesville; It's adorable and I love it.


Even so, I don't like being home alone.

Monday is my birthday, and this is the least excited I've ever been.

Maybe I am getting old?

My dream is a fairytale. I want life to be a struggle where everyone ends up with a castle and a spouse. I want everything to work out. I want a happily ever after. I want to want someone. =) I think wanting a soul mate has always been a bigger dream for me than a profession. It may be my downfall. It's quite distracting at any rate.

SICK AND sleepy (caps lock darn you). I wish that boy was single. Shucks and darn. Three exams on friday. Studied for statics, that was pleasant. Played with a kitten. I showered on campus. Since I'm sleeping on a couch now, and Maggie insisted I put everything in her bathroom, so I couldn't shower there, so I showered at the FL Gym. It was pretty good. Whole locker room to myself. Might do it more often. =)

Well, one way I can think about it is who was the biggest fool? The one who wanted him the mostt being the winner. Surely I am up there. But maybe not the biggest, what do you think Sarah? Ouch.


Anywho. I'm sick. Maggie has strep throat and I'm getting some symptoms, first sore throat, then runny nose and now a general congestion/haze; bleh.

Classes are almost up. I'm going to be fine in circuits and statics, but if I'm too sick to read materials I'll be doomed like a motha.

Watching 23, will go now.

Two nights ago I dreamt he wrote me back. As soon as I woke up I turned on my computer to see if he had. It had been almost a week, but that morning I saw he'd written back. Today I bought and read all the way through Ella Enchanted. The main heroine of course is Ella, and the hero's name is "Char." I'm an emotional roller coaster and he has no idea. Sometimes I hate him with a vengeful passion. Sometimes I wish he'd never left.

Most of the time though I'm on the look out. Green trucks like the one he used to drive, but usually, I'm on the look out for a woman. This is one of the reasons I hate him, because he's caused me to do this. Every female I see, every stranger on the street instills a hateful rage in me until I've confirmed absolutely that her face is not the face of my enemy. And afterwards, after that surge of angry emotion, I become apathetic to the chase because I'm exhausted. It's not her fault, it's his. She doesn't deserve my emotions. But then another stranger walks on the bus and if I don't see her face right away I get angry.

If ever I run into her, I don't know what I would do, but if I sought her out, it would most assuredly be to start a fight. I know where she works. It's a bar, I would just be an angry drunk. Would she recognize me? Would my presence torture her the way her's tortures me?

I don't want to see her. I look for her everywhere just to make sure I am not looking at her.

I'm tired of caring.

My facebook profile says I'm just looking for friendship. But that's not true; I've got friends. I want a boyfriend. Shhhhh. Don't tell anyone.

Charlie's gone.

I'm doing pretty well. He hasn't called or written... maybe he's written I haven't checked, but I doubt it.

The cats are kind of restless, they want to be out and about. They've even tried to beat me out the front door, which they ordinarily don't do.

I'm reading HP, and it's very good so far. I have a lot of fear for them, so it must be good eh?

love love love

I have wonderful friends.

I haven't had the ac on for days now. I think if maggie comes home and turns it on I'll probably be FREEZING. I've adjusted to the heat. Even if I feel a sweat drop now and then, I'm still comfortable now.

Crazy hippy.

I hear that deisel truck outside and I think my dad's just coming home from work. But he's over five hours away.

If I got a scooter I could go visit alycia on the weekends. 80mpg for 700$ Better than a car. 44mph

Shut up truck! I don't want to be nostalgic.

promises
drip into my ears
like muffled screams
and tears.

A drifting monarchy
A sonic boom
The waving admiration
of the moon.

The light flickers
and an out of sorts type
pushes his hands into the grit
trying to stand up.

Swaying dirt and trees
The clouds magnify and shout
Stagger away young man
Stumble quickly away.

The ringing subsides
and the dust in his eyes
is a banner of truth
in these times.

But he told me he'd call
and he promised to write
every night
I'm still waiting.

How long should I wait?